Wednesday, September 30, 2009

"You Are SO Grounded."

When I first became a parent, I SWORE up and down there were things I would not do. I wasn't going to spank my children, or ground them. I was not going to raise my voice, either. I was going to be one of those moms, who, when I WHISPERED, they would know I meant business and act accordingly. I would NEVER let them play video games, either, or fall asleep in the clothes they wore all day. Or eat junk food. The list goes on and on.

And one by one, all those things I said I'd never do, I have found myself doing--sometimes with a vehemence that surprises me. I yell. I swat butts. I ground. I stick soap on tongues. I re-heat processed food for dinner. I stand over them to make sure the project gets done correctly. They are addicted to the wii and their DSs. I've let the baby watch tv in the morning while I blog. We've had (gasp) a handful of doritos and a granola bar for lunch, washed down with kool-aid.

I am a horrible mother! A total "failure" according to my pre-kid resolutions. And yes, I ground them. Or I threaten it. In fact, it is my favorite saying these days. You are so grounded.

And I kind of relish the fact that I have absolute power, as far as the grounding is concerned. They are grounded from video games. Grounded from playing outside. Grounded from the cell phone. Grounded to their rooms. WHATEVER I decide. I am all-powerful, and I wield it like a mighty sword over their heads...if they're reeaaallllly bad.

It's pretty cool, being a mom sometimes. I have the POWER.

Thing Two, whose grades are not the best (he's one of those "brilliant" kids who is LAZIER THAN SNOT) has had video games, TV, computer, action figures, cell phone, and bike riding taken away. At this point, he's had everything taken away for the next two weeks until his grades improve. Because taking away ONE thing doesn't seem to make a difference.

Here's where I get nervous. What ELSE do I take away? Food? Um, no. I think we will go with the earlier bedtime as a last resort, because he HATES bedtime. And he hates it when I hawk over him, re-directing him when he gets off task. Well, he's going to have to get used to it. He will NOT have a "D" in his easiest subject, just becasue he doesn't want to turn his work in!!!

One day, the Absolute Power will be gone. My kids will roll their eyes at me and rebel. Mutiny. So, I need to tread lightly. Because I don't want them to realize that I am just a mom flailing her arms hopelessly, praying something works.

But for now, they are SO grounded!!!


Michelle Miles said...

I have the same problem with mine! Don't feel bad. We all go through it. There's a reason why God made children cute - it's because He knew we wouldn't kill them. ;)

Devon Ellington said...

You're doing absolutely the right thing. They have to know that there are consequences for their actions.

And you know what? A little junk food and some video games aren't gonna hurt them. If everything was banned, when they rebelled, it would be much worse.

You're an excellent mother.