Tuesday, November 06, 2007

I'M DOOMED.

DOOMED, I tell you!

Status: Doomed. Other than that, just OK. Thing Two was diagnosed with Pneumonia so we've got him on the Super-Duper-Wipe-The-Germs-Out-3-Day antibiotics. He's actually already better after one dose. We're out of the woods, thank heaven.

So you may be asking, why am I doomed? I'll tell you. The Holidays are here. I am really big on the Holidays. And Holiday Food. And Cold Weather Comfort Food. I go crazy baking cakes and pies and warm cookies and lots of Holiday treats, in fact my specialty? Delectable Fudge. And nothing is better than Applets and Cotlets. Oh, and don't forget Egg Nog. And those white chocolate covered pretzels with green sprinkles...

I think you can guess where I'm going with this. I just had a baby, folks. I am not genetically blessed like my friends Aimee and Jenni, who walk out of the hospital after having babies wearing the same jeans they wore in College. Nope, not me. And this last pregnancy I was on bed rest, which wreaked havoc on my waistline. And I wasn't exactly Gisele Bundchen before I got pregnant either, so let's just say, I have some weight to lose.

And don't worry, we're going to Hawaii over Christmas. Six Weeks away.

This is why I'm Doomed. I barely survived Halloween Candy. Now that the Christmas stuff is pouring into the stores, and Hubby gets tins of cookies and baskets of goodies and boxes of chocolates from his people (which I might have to be bad and "redistribute") I am telling you, TEMPTATION GALORE.

I have been very good as of late--I've lost six pounds already. But I have to make some drastic changes this Holiday season.

1) No baking unless it's for OTHER people.
2) No trips to Target's Christmas Goodie Aisle (a sure failure if I even go within ten feet)
3) When Hubby comes home with candy/baskets/anything high fat, our neighbors will be "Christmas Ding-Dong-Ditched" with said Christmas Goodies. Anonymously of course, so they'll have to take it.

I think it's for the best. I would like to lie on the beach and not have news crews swarm around me and people mourning for me to be put back out at sea before I suffocate. When I snorkel, I don't want to be NERVOUS that there are whaling ships close by, you know?

Maybe I'm exaggerating a little, but I want to be trim again. My wedding dress was a size SIX, dammit! (Okay, so I was a little "thin" for my wedding) But, the Holidays are going to test me. The odds, frankly aren't in my favor. But I will be vigilant.

CONSTANT VIGILANCE! (Okay, for some reason I don't think I spelled that right. It looks weird. But you get my point.)

6 comments:

Lowa said...

I hear you! It happens with the fourth kid, too. I was like your friends and back into my skinny clothes pretty much immediatley with the first two. The third took a little longer and by the fourth, it wasn't happening. Although I was a size four or so when she was a baby (the nursing really helps!) when she weaned herself, I slowly started gaining. Now I am a 10 and I was a ZERO when I got married! What does that tell you?? LOL

We are going to Hawai'i at the end of this month. *I* am the one who has to worry about whaling ships:) NOT YOU!

Hang in there! You can do it!

Hope the pnuemonia goes away SOON. My kids have had that a few times and it is NO FUN. Esp when it took the dumb Dr's about a week to daignose Clown when he wasn't even two years old. I kept on telling them and finally took him to the ER where they figured it out! *sigh*

Janey said...

This is why I an not having kids! I'll adopt, maybe. I know tons of women who were thin and then as soon as they gave birth, they just never were the same. Not for me.

Rooting for you though. I have been to Hawaii tons of times. You find all sorts there. I wouldn't worry.

Anonymous said...

You're not doomed! You're gorgeous! And thanks for the love, but I'd never be able to fit into college jeans. I totally get you on the desperate need to bake holiday things! Think of all the "service" you can renderby giving it all away!

Colin said...

Hope Thing Two recovers quick! That's not a good one to get but so long as it's on the way out, the sooner the better.

Enjoy Hawaii - that is awesome!

Anonymous said...

It's that time of year. SMells of cinnamon and baking things. We just naturally want to eat. I always gain about 5-10 pounds over the holidays. Then in January is starvation!

Michelle Miles said...

I'm afriand my Thing might have pneumonia. I'm taking him to the doctor tomorrow to find out.

You aren't doomed! You just need restraint, self-control, and will-power. You can do it. GO GIRL GO!