My life is a Zoo.

This is just the best representation of how my life is right now. Crazy, and INSANE.

Thing Four is walking now, and he's also decided he doesn't like afternoon naps. We're down to just one in the morning. We're still having soccer practices and games, add those to Basketball practices and games (every night of the week) and throw in some cub scouts, girl scouts, Student council meetings, after-school clubs and all the other running around I normally have to do, and I'm a mess.

And Hubby's back is out. He's in extreme pain, and couldn't do ANYTHING this weekend. So everything was on me. I finally snapped Sunday morning and told everyone I WASN'T their servant, and they could get their own food/clothes/ etc. etc.

I just couldn't take it any more. I yelled at them all in the car on the way to church. Yeah, I was feeling the Spirit...NOT.

So, today, I'm better, but I've already been to the store, the cleaners, the bank, and I just fertilized the lawn while the baby was napping. Thank heaven he still takes a morning nap. I am counting on those to get me through NaNo. He takes about a two hour nap, between 10 and 12. That will just be my SACRED WRITING TIME, the entire month of November. I won't plan anything during that time, and I won't let anything else get in my way.

We just had lunch and now I have to run to Sam's Club, because we're out of some things, and as soon as the kids come home from school we have to turn around and go back to school for Thing One's basketball game. At least the baby can be loud all he wants, and no one will care! Then we'll have to have a quick Family Night and dinner.

Heh heh, Hubby just called and asked me if I would help him with some of his work tonight, after the kids are in bed. (This is usually another "sacred" time for us.)

Bring it on.

A Little Friday Fun...

Karen did this on her blog the other day, and I thought it was a hoot. So, here's my attempt. I Yearbooked myself.

I started with my Senior Portrait, taken in 1990:

Here's what I'd have looked like in 1952: And 1958 (My Patsy Cline Phase):

And then there's 1964:

And of course, 1966:

Don't forget 1968:

1974 was a good year:

But 1984 was the BEST hair year ever:

I am happy to report that I NEVER had the 1984 hair. Even when it was cool. Now I'm going to go "yearbook" Hubby! Bwahhahahahahahahaaaaa.....

Have a good weekend, everyone!

I'm Proud of Me.

I am actually kinda proud of myself. I was researching a new novel, and I was thinking about NaNo (which for you non-writers is National Novel Writing Month) and I decided to just do it.

I've been too "scared" of NaNo for too long. And I know it's something I can accomplish. In order to be a NaNo winner, you need to write 50,000 words in 30 days, during the month of November. Sounds easy, right? Well, it's not as easy as it seems. Especially if you're not prepared. Or wholly committed to making the time each day to write.

I have decided I AM. I've recently written a novel of over 60K in 45 days, so I know it's an achievable goal.

Sure, I'm a busy mom. I have four kids (one of them is 16 months) and they're all in extracurricular activities and sports, and my Hubby is an always-traveling workaholic, but you know what? I want to do this. For myself. I can make the time, whether during nap time, or at night. I just need to be smart and efficient. AND NOT A PERFECTIONIST. That's a muscle I'll want to use. I am the type to revise a chapter until I feel it's right. Can't do that with NaNo. It's basically an organized stream-of-consciousness thing. NO editing. That will be weird. But it will also help me to get more done in a shorter time, if I'm not stopping to re-read and fix stuff.

I have a good support group. One of my good friends is determined to do it, too. It's always good to have that common denominator. We can cheer each other on!

ROCK ON, NANO!!!

Percolating.

No more bizarre dreams for now, thank heaven. I think you guys are right. I subconsciously feel inept because my house is a constant chore--and I'm only one person, with three helpers who only "help cheerfully" for about an hour and then after that they're DONE. Cue major grumbling and murmuring...
Last night I was so tired when I fell into bed I don't remember falling asleep, OR dreaming. I think I was lulled to sleep by the debate last night. It was booooring. Same old stuff they talked about last time. *Zzzzzzzzz*

ANYWAY, I woke up at 5am this morning and couldn't go back to sleep, so I decided to clean my office. It sure cleans up nice. Then again, before I started on it--it looked like a category 3 tornado had blown through. When I write, I'm not "clean." I have notes and books everywhere, slips of paper, rejected printups, gum wrappers, empty Postum/herbal tea cups...you name it.

Now it's immaculate, clean and dusted, and I filed all my research and papers. It also helps that it was supposed to be a bedroom originally and I have a big walk-in closet that holds lots of...stuff. ;-)

The kids have the dentist after school today. Things One and Three have been immaculate about their teeth, but Thing Two would go WEEKS without brushing if I didn't get on him about it every day. So, I'm worried about him. His idea of a good cleaning is brushing for about ten seconds total. And it's not like I can stand right next to him and make sure he brushes for the full two minutes--so, yeah, I'm nervous for him.

I need to do some sort of "brush your teeth" reward system for him. He's tough to motivate when it comes to teeth. Sounds like my sister someone I knew growing up...

Hubby comes home from L.A. today. Apparently it's been warm and sunny there, the OPPOSITE of here. We haven't seen the sun for four days. It's depressing. I don't mind rain and clouds, but several days in a row and I start to want some sunshine.

I have a story idea that's been percolating for about six months now. I've written notes on it, and morphed one of my other story ideas into the beginning. I think I might rest on the sequel for a bit (since I'm still waiting for my research book--they asked me to give it a few days and THEN they'd give me a refund) and work on this story. Can't hurt. I want to see where it goes. I haven't plotted it out at all, which is not the norm for me. I like to plot plot plot, and have it all down before I even start writing.

We'll see what happens! Happy Wednesday! I get to go to Home Depot today. Why is that exciting to me?

Eggzactly.

I had the CRAZIEST dream last night. It was one of those all-night-into-the-early-morning marathon dreams. I swear those are usually the most bizarre.

I dreamed these people invaded my home, and as the kids and I cowered together (inside the shell of an old car inside the house) one of the ladies walked up to us, brandishing something, and started...shampooing and conditioning my daughter's hair. She was giving her a "bath."

Then they started on my sons, and I saw a lot of them, darting back and forth, and they were cleaning my house. They were mopping, vacuuming, dusting, etc. There were dozens of them (only it was some freaky trick, they all had the same face as the blonde lady who was bathing my kids) and there was a man in the midst of it all, who looked a lot like Fred Willard, the actor. I had run to one of my bathrooms and was scrubbing the toilet before the lady came in, because I was embarrassed of how dirty it was. Only this toilet was BEYOND. It had sludge in it, and I was trying to dislodge it, and Fred Willard came up to me with a clipboard and a pen, and said "Are you so-and-so?" I nodded my head, and he motioned me to the kitchen table.

By the way, I wasn't even in my own house. I was in some weird house I'd never been in before. There was a lot of white in it, and it didn't look a thing like a house I'd ever lived in.
Well, Fred looked at me and said "I have you down as ordering some NuSkin products way back in 1993, and according to our records, you haven't ordered any since."

I just looked at him, mouth agape.

He told me that they were cleaning my house, in an effort to get me back as a customer. They had been hunting down their old customers, and hoping a deep house cleaning would convince them to order more products. I felt like I HAD to order something, since they had cleaned my WHOLE house for pete's sake, and one of the blonde clones sat down at the table with me and showed me their catalog of NuSkin products.

That's when the alarm went off. I just sat up in bed and was like, WTHeck?

Anyone care to decipher THAT one? Sheesh. I think I'm going nuts.

ANYWAY, the baby has become obsessed with eggs. He thinks they are THE BOMB. First it was bouncy balls, then clocks, and now, it's eggs. He just loves their shape. I have all these old wooden eggs that look real from my Easter decorations, and I let him play with them, and they're his favorite toy. He holds the eggs really tight in his chubby little hands and looks up at me with joy. "EGGS!" he says, with a big grin on his face. And his favorite book is "The Big Red Barn" because there's eggs in it. Yeah. We read that one about 20 times a day. And he has a baby heart attack when he sees me taking eggs out of the carton to make for breakfast, and he wants to hold them. Um, sorry sweetie.

I wonder what's next? Hopefully something less fragile. ;-)

I Did It.

I just finally did it. I was so sick of the "turtle slowness" and the waiting--last night I wiped my computer's hardrive and started over.

It's running soooooo quick now. I love it. I've alreayd re-installed everything, and all my files, and now I'm just fixing odds and ends. When I first got the computer, we had two users, me and Hubby. All the switching back and forth caused problems, so we tried to "morph" everything into one and delete one user. But then we had confusion, and it made the computer run slow. Now we have ONE user and everything is common, and I can't believe the difference. I should have reformatted the hard drive LONG ago.

Watched "Made of Honor" last night. Adorable movie! Patrick Dempsey was perfect, and his chemistry with the lead actress was wonderful. I laughed out loud at more than one part, and although it was a tad predictable, I still loved it. HIGHLY recommend to my fellow "chick flick" watchers.

The weather is gross today. It rained all day yesterday, and today is not looking so hot either. I need to mow the lawn! But I can't when its this wet. And it looks like rain the next two days, too. UGH. I don't like it when weather messes with my plans.

I am highly annoyed because THE research book I have been waiting for still hasn't come yet. I finally emailed the store and told them to research it's whereabouts--if they can't find it either they need to resend one or issue me a refund. It came from the U.K., but I've been waiting since September 12th. Certainly long enough to send a book. It's the one book I need to read before I can even start plotting my ancient-day storyline. But I did get a lot of other research done this weekend. I had to look up the archaeological excavation of mounds, and how it's done. FASCINATING stuff. Well, tedious and boring stuff, but the FINDS can be cool. :-)

It's Monday! I have to run around but I don't feel like it. Hubby is in L.A. soaking up the sun (as he runs from meeting to meeting, I know, but at least its sunny) so I'm on my own for a week. I'd better get going. I have to get some laundry done before something rises up out of the dirty sock pile and kills us all in our sleep...

Sunday.

Yes, I don't normally blog on Sundays, but Hubby is in L.A. and I'm a tad bored. Because I force myself to RELAX on Sundays. :-) Also, I got tagged by Brenda, so here goes:

If you have pets, do you see them as merely animals, or are they members of your family?
No pets. Hubby and Thing One are allergic to anything non-human. We had beta fish once, and they WERE part of the family. We even moved them with us from Wisconsin to Colorado and back to Wisconsin again. Since they’ve died, we still don’t have the heart to replace them.

R.I.P Paulie and Blueberry.

If you could have a dream come true, what would it be?
To go on an archaeological adventure—and DISCOVER something. If I had to be really specific: I'd LOVE to unearth a portrait of Mary Newman Drake, Francis Drake's first wife. Nothing of hers has survived. Not a letter, a hanky, nothing. I'm on a sort of "mission" to find something...

What is the one thing most hated by you?
Anyone who would steal my children’s innocence.

What would you do with a billion dollars?
Pay tithing on it, have some serious fun, and make sure my family was well taken care of. Then I would donate to Breast Cancer Research, and other charities.

What helps to pull you out of a bad mood?
Hugs, playing with the baby, SHOPPING. But not for clothes. For “stuff” at a fun place like Hobby Lobby or Michael’s or those sorts of places.

Choose one letter of your name and come up with a word to describe yourself.
L—Lively. I’m very animated. My college roommates called me a “female Jim Carrey.”

What’s your bedtime routine?
Don’t have one. I am sporadic in everything I do. Sometimes I remember to wash my face and brush my teeth, but sometimes, you just are too dang tired and you just want to fall into bed.

What kind of books do you buy?
RESEARCH books, for whatever subject I am currently writing about. Otherwise give me a mystery or adventure with a touch of romance, and I’m hooked. I buy those in abundance.

Where do you want to be in ten years?
Inside Barnes & Noble, admiring my own shelf of books written by me…

What kind of person do you think the person who tagged you is?
Brenda and I have known each other for years. I think Brenda is a genuinely good, large-hearted person, who sees Life for what it is and handles things with amazing inner strength-- and rolls with whatever comes her way. She’s loyal and funny, and a good mother. She’s also human, just like me. She’s relatable, she’s personable, and she doesn’t take crap from anyone. She rocks.

What’s the first thing you do when you wake up?
Drink a glass of orange juice before going upstairs and attempting to WAKE THE DEAD.

What’s your favorite food?
Sushi.

Formal Wear or Casual Wear?
Please. I LOVE vacuuming in my Donna Reed pearls and After-Five dress and heels. Okay, that was sarcasm. CASUAL.

Sports: Football or baseball?
It’s a tie. If BYU is playing, it’s FOOTBALL. If the Yankees are playing, it’s BASEBALL.

What do you consider your guilty pleasure?
Can I have more than one? Let's see--IBC Rootbeer floats, POPSUGAR (Gotta have my “news” fix!), Sunday naps, and trips to the grocery store SANS kids.

People I'd like to tag: Mik and Devon and Karen. (If they have time!)

Also, at the risk of introducing politics into my blog, someone please explain something to me: All these richer-than-rich celebrities who are pro-Obama--aren't they going to get the PANTS taxed off them if he gets into Office? I just thought it was sort of funny...

Happy Sunday!

Tricks Parents Do...

Hubby and I would like to think we're good parents. We have four kids, and would LIKE to think that we have them in control. Then again, our kids are still young. Thing One turns 11 this month, and she's already acting like a sassy, cranky 16-year old. *Sigh*

So, as parents, Hubby and I can be very sarcastic. The problem with that is, sometimes (okay most of the time) young kids take things very literally. I learned this early on, when Thing One had an irrational fear of going to the Dr. She was seven, and I was sarcastic. Ooops.

Thing One: Mom?

Me: Yes?

Thing One: "What happens when they give you a physical?"

Me: *Heavy sigh* Honey, I've already told you what happens, about ten times.

Thing One: I know, but I want to know again.

Me: (Frustrated voice) They listen to your heart, check your ears, mouth, they press on your tummy and check you out, and make sure everything is as it should be.
(pause)
And you hardly feel it when they stick the needles in your eyes for the eye test. It's just a little "stick."

I gave her a little wink, but I forgot that she was seven, and sarcasm was lost on her. She started to cry and I had to comfort her (all the while feeling like a jacka**) and I had to reassure her about 49372 more times before we got to the dr's office that NO, they weren't going to stick needles in her eyes.

Lesson Learned.

But sometimes, sometimes you have to tell "little white lies" to get your kids to do what you want. Dont' shake your head and act like you've never done it. Because I know you have. I have been the victim of such maliciousness. For years I thought a horrible, terrible, mean-spirited man named "Nutrition Man" came the night after Halloween and took all my candy away, not even leaving me one little piece left.

Yep, that's what my parents told me. I HATED Nutrition Man. He was evil.

Hubby and I, two houses ago, took advantage of all the animal footprints in the snow around our house to tell our kids they were ELF footprints and that Santa's elves were checking in on them, to see if they were naughty or nice. (heh heh, I've never seen a more guilty look on Thing Two's face when we told him that!)

Oh, and I told my daughter that dutch mints were "Mommy's medicine" once. (Okay, she was two, and would have choked!)

So, I felt really really bad about a recent "lie telling." Thing One has a boy at school who walked up to her one day, and said "I like you" and ran off. Shocked her to the gills. But she was elated, because apparently she'd liked him for AGES.

So, naturally, we've been having all sorts of conversations at home about this boy, and how he sits with her at lunch, and during reading time, and (THANK HEAVEN) all they do is smile at each other and make small talk--and she asked me if I ever kissed a boy when I was in fifth grade.

"Heavens no."

"Why, mom?"

"Well, I don't want to turn into a troll."

"a WHAT?"

"If you kiss boys on the lips before you're sixteen, your face becomes all deformed and you look like a troll--for the rest of your life."

I WAS KIDDING, PEOPLE! TOTALLY DEADPANNING!! SHE'S NEARLY ELEVEN! SHE GETS SARCASM NOW!!!

Or so I thought. She got this terrified look on her face, and asked me if I was serious. I quickly laughed and said "No way!" But of course then we had the lecture about how she was wayyy too young to be kissing boys, yadda yadda yadda, and every once in a while she would ask me if I was kidding about the troll thing. I felt TERRIBLE.

So, word to the wise: please ABSTAIN from being sarcastic with your children. Unless they're teens, they won't get it. And you may freak them out for life!

Time to go play with my kids. We have some cupcakes to make, and a trip to Half Price Books with our name on it!

I Need to Avoid Target Like The Plague.

Egads, yesterday was crazy. I hardly had time to breathe. I ran around, and then had back-to-back soccer scrimmages at the Indoor Center starting RIGHT after school, and Team Picture night, and didn't get home until 9:30. The poor baby was beyond tired. Lucky for me, he's an angel.

The day started out okay--just had to do about twelve loads of laundry. So I got started, and then I got The Bug. Or rather, the Target Bug. I realized I hadn't been to Target in AGES, and they usually have a lot of fun seasonal stuff. Naturally, I was just going to look, mind you. I only had in mind to buy the Ironman DVD. And I had to buy a basketball for Thing One, who has started practices.

As soon as the baby woke up from his nap and we had lunch, we went. It was like...a candy store. I had to walk up and down every aisle. Suddenly, things I wouldn't need in a million years I HAD TO HAVE, THEY WERE SO CUTE/ADORABLE/COOL/NIFTY/EDUCATIONAL/WHATEVER RATIONALIZATION I CHOSE AT THE MOMENT.

UGH.

Then, $120 later at checkout, it hit me: when have I EVER shopped at Target and not spent over $100?

Looking over my purchases, they really were things that were important: six white long-sleeved boys shirts (my boys wear them under their short-sleeved shirts and VOILA, they can wear them in winter too) socks and shoes and jeans (and a really cute winter hat and mitten set) for the baby, two really cool nail polish colors, a basketball, my Ironman DVD. (Okay, so the DVD was frivolous, but I consider any purchase with Robert Downey Jr. in it a necessity)

I didn't buy one Fall decoration, or any costumes. Or candy. Or kitchen stuff/dishes, or books. I was actually pretty good. Yet, I still spent way over what I'd planned.

I just need to stay away from Target from now on. Period. Times are different than they were...say...LAST YEAR. Last year (and every year before that) I went to Target weekly and spent some serious $$$. Now, with gas and groceries as expensive as they are, not to mention feeding and clothing and paying for sports/activities/etc.etc.etc. for four children...well...I'm on a budget. I've cut waayyyy down on my spending.

It's a first. But it's necessary. These are precarious times. You really can't take anything for granted any more. I clean my own house. My personal trainer is gonzo. (I've found that with her structured workouts, I can manage just fine on my own, surprise surprise.)

Yeah, I'm not being funny today. But yesterday reiterated to me, how careful I need to be. How careful we ALL need to be.

NOT YET!!!!

I AM NOT READY!!! DO YOU HEAR ME????

*ahem* Got that out of my system. Today I had to put hats and gloves on my children. The house is cold. I've been wearing my pashmina around. I'm craving a pot of Postum, from my soon-to-be-extinct stash.

I don't want the cold weather!! Although I love chunky sweaters and jeans and cute boots and all that stuff--I just am psychologically not "there" yet. Maybe because we had such a nasty winter last time, but I just want those "crisp" days of fall, not "freezing" days of fall...

So, I had a friend as me what my favorite things about Fall are. They are as follows:

1) Hay rides and Hay mazes (it was a tie)
2) Hot cider and doughnuts around a bonfire
3) Trees changing color
4) Halloween decorations (but NOT the gory/ghoulish/creepy/Night of the Living Dead type)
5) Mellowcreme pumpkins

That's about it for now.

I had a productive day yesterday. You can now "walk into" my walk in closet, my bathroom is scoured to perfection (why is it so HUGE when I'm cleaning it, and normal sized otherwise?) and my room and the workout room connected to it are all pristine. Dusted, vacuumed, perfect.

I'm still exhausted.

Today is Laundry day. Excuse me while I run outside and turn a few cartwheels on the lawn. At least I know for sure there aren't any covert "clean clothes" snuck into the dirty piles. I was the Laundry Basket Nazi all last week. My boys won't do THAT again! :-D

Well, time to do what I normally do...